The societal stigmas surrounding sexual pleasure & masturbation in women is disheartening and sad to see in 2023. Luckily, there are some seriously badass, sex-positive educators who are pushing for female masturbation to finally live at the forefront of sexual education. With the astonishing benefits masturbation does for our physical and mental health, it’s crazy to think we still aren’t talking more about female self-pleasure!
Before we start, let’s make one thing clear – you don’t have to do it and you don’t have to like it just because you tried it. Masturbation is a fantastic source of self-exploration, helping to re-establish a positive relationship with ourselves while boosting our self-confidence and our moods, but it is never something you should feel pressured to do.
Masturbation is a unique self-care tool that you can use to get to know your body as well as your likes & dislikes and what really turns you on in the bedroom. It shows you that you have complete control over your body and what you like to do with it. As we continue to live in times where the female body is continuously being contested, being able to dictate pleasure on our own terms allows us to reinforce the relationship we have with ourselves and our incredible bodies.
When we orgasm, a cocktail of hormones are released such as oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin and vasopressin. The release of these feel-good hormones can help to regulate your stress response, calming anxiety, and relieve pain such as headaches and period cramps.
Regular self-pleasure has been shown to boost women’s overall feeling of self-worth while giving back to ourselves. Creating a positive relationship with your body’s desires will allow you to discover your boundaries and where your comfort zone lies. This gives you the tools to be able to talk openly about sex and pleasure in your relationship. The more you know about your body, the easier it is to communicate that to someone else.
Masturbation while in a relationship can significantly improve the overall quality of your sex life with your partner. Self-pleasure can be brought into the bedroom as a stimulating style of foreplay! You know where you like to be touched, where you like to be kissed, and what kind of pressure you like, so rather than telling your partner what you like…show them instead!
There are many different ways you can achieve an orgasm by yourself. For some, hands are all you need. For others, the addition of a toy gives that special feeling you just can’t replicate by yourself. Sex toys are all about trial and error and taking the time to find the style that suits you and your sexual preferences. The same idea can be adopted to porn & other erotic sources whether that is books or even podcast. Guided masturbation podcasts are an amazing thing, as they shift the focus away from solely being about orgasm, but more about awakening your whole body to see what else can bring you pleasure.
We are so fortunate to live in a movement of female sex positivity where more and more women are openly talking about self-pleasure. The benefits of masturbation are tenfold and should be both normalized and talked about without shame!